Home Buying Feels so much like Online Dating!

Home buying is a tough and emotionally exhausting process. I thought it would feel exciting like those shows on HGTV where you get to peruse homes and choose one from your top three at the end. It’s not! This process is excruciating! My husband and I have looked at 19 homes in 2 weeks and put down two offers. Each time we think we’ve found the one, we start imagining our life in that house and decorating it and redesigning it in our minds. We walk the streets with our new baby and picture waking up in the room. We become so emotionally invested that after the first offer we made was denied, I cried all day mourning its loss.

It is starting to remind me of what it felt like to do online dating before I met my husband. You search and search and then finally you think you’ve found the right partner and you make an offer to them to be together and when they say no you feel so confused and hurt, because you already wrote your whole story together. My husband and I met on OK Cupid, but I also used Tinder before I met him and it was such an exhausting process of elimination. Nowadays with websites and apps like Realtor.com and Zillow it feels a lot similar to that dating process.

First, you decide you want to buy a home or meet someone. You set up your account on several sites and enter your criteria: Open concept, large kitchen, backyard, 3 bed 2 bath under $400,000 versus open minded, tall, smart, between the ages of 30-40.

Then you start swiping! That one looks beautiful and right in my wheelhouse swipe right! That one doesn’t look the prettiest, but it is cheap and has a nice profile- save for later. Compile a list of those your have approved.

Message them for a date. Have your realtor call and set up a showing. Fill up your calendar with coffee and dinner dates. Start spending every evening and weekend looking at houses.

First impressions aren’t always the same in person as they are online!! This house looked way prettier in the picture. That paint is all chipping and the picture of the backyard made it look so much bigger. I really thought I would love this one, but it’s lacking in personality. Man, this guy really fibbed on his profile picture. He looks ten times older and way heavier. He sounded so witty in his profile, now he’s totally boring or weird. I can’t believe I thought he was the one. Back to the drawing board!

Ten dates later, wow I finally found the one! I hope he likes me too. Let’s ask if they want to hang out again? Omg I want to make an offer on this house! I didn’t think I would love it so much, call realtor and submit an offer at asking price. Wait for response….

“Well, we are reviewing other offers. There are just so many options these days how can we commit to just one? I think we will go with the higher bid and the better letter!”

“I’m not really looking for something serious, you are great and all, but I’d much rather see what else is out there!”

Ugh, alone again! Why is it so competitive! I feel defeated and not really in the mood to keep going on dates and keep looking at houses. 24 hours later….

Swipe swipe swipe. Save save save. Okay I think I’m ready again, let’s get back out there. There is another one I really think I’d love. Set up date, call realtor, buy new makeup, go out!

Rinse repeat feel let down. Rinse repeat feel let down. Rinse repeat….Finally the ONE! We both agree it is a good match and we live happily ever after! The END!


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